What will you write in the obituary for your family member?

It’s a day we all dread. 

 I was 28 when I wrote the obituary for my young husband, killed in an avalanche. Since then I’ve written notices for my step-mother, my father, and most recently, for my mother who died peacefully in her own pretty room at Inglewood in June 2003.  She slipped away “at home” in her own bed, as she would have wished. 

It was a great comfort to realize that the loss of each resident is truly felt by Inglewood’s staff, residents, and other family members.

 When writing Mom’s obituary, I thought at first of suggesting “instead of flowers,”  donations to the Alzheimer's Society which had given Mom and me both so much support over the last eight years. But then I thought of something even closer to home–the Inglewood Residents Council.

 I asked friends and family who wanted to honour my Mom’s memory to do so by contributing to the Residents Council at Inglewood–specifically to buy a lilac tree for the new Friendship Garden, due to “bloom” in the spring of 2005. They were delighted by the idea. I liked the thought that Mom, in this way, would play a small part in making Inglewood even more homelike for the residents.

 The Residents Council has so many worthwhile projects–those “extras” that make all the difference. They have raised money to renovate the Lodge lounge and build the new Friendship Garden. They have purchased such varied items as 25 beautiful chromatic hand chimes for Inglewood’s new Hand Chime Choir, and a finger-clip oxymeter so nurses can more easily check oxygen levels in residents, when necessary.

 So when that sad day comes for you as it did for me, may I respectfully ask that you consider honouring your family member by suggesting donations to: Inglewood Residents Council, 725 Inglewood Ave., West Vancouver, V7T 1X5.   

Thank you,

Kerry McPhedran

On behalf of the Inglewood Family/Community Advisory Board

 To honour her mother’s memory, Kerry continues to volunteer at Inglewood, and to visit with the residents who, she says, “give me so much more in return.”

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